Perhaps I have spent too much time iRacing on my home driving simulator? Perhaps I have operated too much “by the book” (as in the driver’s handbook)? Or perhaps I have allowed my trigger-happy temper to control me? Whatever the source of my intolerance, the sheer number of people who cannot appropriately drive a car amazes me. I have lived in several states and have noticed some unusual driver idiosyncrasies in each. When living in Oregon, for example, driving down…
Three decades ago, a show was on HBO called Dream On in which the protagonist, a book editor played by Brian Benben, often found himself in a conversation or circumstance which reminded him of a movie scene from his childhood. To demonstrate his mental recollection to the viewer, the show’s writers creatively interjected a short clip of actual movie footage (usually black and white) before flipping back to the character’s response in the scene. My mind has worked exactly this…
The summer sun was now a memory as I sat on the lonely tarmac of the small Nevada, Missouri airport (I currently live in the state pronounced “Nev-aaaaa-da,” but in Missouri they pronounce this town “Nev-ay-da”). I was a student pilot on just my third solo cross-country flight, only 23 flight hours in my logbook. The plane, a white and blue-trimmed Cessna 150, had refused to start for nearly thirty minutes as darkness was rapidly approaching from the east. The…
There have been a few events in my life (OK, my childhood) which could have led to unfortunate consequences for myself or others. All were avoidable and demonstrate the poor judgment of a child. When I was in 4th grade, living in Fremont, California, I did what many other unsupervised 9 year-old kids did…my own thing. While exploring a large field across the street from our house, I chanced upon a hatchet. Naturally, I had to pick up this modern…
I cannot stand stains on my clothes. I absolutely abhor (hate…just trying out a new word) them, especially food stains. Although I have repeatedly tried to resist, if I am dining at a restaurant and even the slightest bit of food grazes my shirt, leaving behind the most minuscule dot (of grease? protein? starch?), it would appear I have a 911 case of diarrhea by the sheer speed with which I can race to the restroom, fully intent on saturating…
In the 1950’s, similar to the Beverly Hillbillies, my grandparents left the Ozark Mountains with a carload of kids for the land of fruits and nuts… California. Their journey was slightly different than that of the Clampetts, however, as they didn’t strike oil. In fact, my grandparents probably lost a whole lot of oil on narrow and undulating Route 66. They didn’t settle in a Beverly Hills mansion, either. Instead, my grandparents paid $8,000 for a 1,000 square foot starter…
The climber is nearing the summit, steps shortening, breaths deepening, legs burning, vision narrowing. Ever so close to the destination, he can almost reach out and touch it! This final quarter mile has been challenging, however, with too-many-to-count rest breaks. He thinks back to his youth, a time when he muttered those familiar, oft-spoken words from the back seat of the car during an all-day trip, “Are we there yet?” Sir Edmund Hillary scaling Everest? No, Marcus Armstrong nearing the…
Middle-age is a rough place to be. In your mind, you “know” you can still fly down a mountain with two planks strapped to your feet, throw a wicked overhand breaking ball, and run a 10K…the whole thing…without stopping! But your body knows better. You have gotten too fat to bend over and strap on those ski boots, you tore your rotator cuff (for the second time) and insurance won’t pay for a shoulder replacement until you are 70 (because…
I have a very hard time slowing down when I speak, especially when I am excited or passionate about something. An example of this is when helping my wife with a project by first explaining the process to her. As a self-proclaimed Know-It-All, that’s what I do…I explain things. Unfortunately, I speak like I am from New York (I am not) and she listens like she is from Texas (she is not). Oh, and caffeine is routinely coursing through my…
So I had a near brush with death the other day. No, I wasn’t driving my oversized SUV through the roundabout like I was a wannabe road racer (this has happened). I was just being the responsible family man maintaining his pool – brushing, removing leaves, shocking it with chlorine. Near drowning you ask, impatiently? Wrong again…pull up a chair eager grasshopper…let me tell you about it. After my pool pump stopped doing its one and only job I had…